My curly headed little girl....

....turned one today!! I can't believe a year ago today Avery Margaret was born. What a blessing she has been in this family. We got home this morning at 9:00 from our trip. Long story short, we were going to drive yesterday till we got home. We should have gotten home around 1:00 in the morning, but decided to stop 3 hours from home. There were really bad storms that we knew we were going to run into if we continued to drive. So, we woke up this morning, in the same clothes we went to bed in and got back on the road. We gave Avery her birthday gifts after we got unpacked. We then had a quiet dinner at home with the 5 of us. It was nice to sit and enjoy each other. She had her first sweet after dinner. We let her have a cupcake! She liked it at first and then decided it was better to just play with it. She was so cute!! We will be having her party next weekend, but it was nice to have a little celebration for her today.

Dear Avery,

To me, you are my Avery girl, my Affie, my Affers, and my Avery Margaret. You can light up a room from a mile away!! Out of all my girls, you smile the most and it takes nothing at all to get you to smile!! I love your curly hair and your big blue eyes. You have brought joy to this house. Your sisters love you to pieces. When you get up from a nap or in the morning, you look for them and then you give them the biggest smiles. They both think the world of you and love to look after you and "Mother" you. I love our Wednesday's alone. Just you and me...running errands and playing.

We named you after your great-Grandma and I often think of her when I look at you. The Lord knew she would never meet you. It saddens me, but I know she would love the fact that she was named after you. She would have loved to hold you and sing to you.

I rocked you to sleep tonight (you always fall asleep on your own in your bed), because I wanted time with you, I wanted to think about the last year, I wanted to tell you things I don't always tell you, I wanted to just hold you, love on you and kiss you. You fell asleep in my arms and I loved every moment of it! I then prayed and thanked God for you.

I thank God for you, Avery. You are a gift from above. I know the Lord has entrusted you to Daddy and I. I know it is our responsibility to raise you in a Godly way. I pray we will continue to do that. I know I have said this before, but I am often asked if we want a boy or if we wanted a boy when I was pregnant with you. The answer is a very firm NO. Daddy and I were thrilled to pieces to know you were a little girl. You are our little girl and we are more than thankful you are in our lives. You complete this family and we can't imagine you not being here.

Little Affie girl, know you Mama loves you! Happy Birthday!

Love,
Mommy

First Haircut

Do you think I waited long enough???

There is just something about that first haircut! I know she needed it, but I just wasn't ready! I finally decided it was time because it was in her face all the time! I was feeling really bad for her. I can't put bows in her hair because she pulls them out and thinks they are snacks! She did really well with her first haircut and I am really glad we took her. Her are some pictures of her being a big girl! This is 2 days shy of her 9 month birthday!

And here is the after picture!

Give and Take

We got pregnant with our 3rd child around the time we were going through some tough things. God knew we needed a joy in our life at that time. Little did we know what this little baby would mean to us. I was very close to my Mom's Mom - my Grandma (and am still close to my Grandpa). My Grandma got sick this past December and was in the hospital for a week. She was then sent to a nursing home to go through some physical therapy and she was then going to be sent home if all went well. She took a turn for the worse on the Saturday before Christmas. She was admitted to the hospital and put into the ICU. She knew through all of this that she was dying. The nurses and Dr.'s said she was not, but she was sure that she was. On Sunday, the day before Christmas Eve, Mom got a call saying Grandma was wanting to see her. We left church early and Mom, Lynn, Tim and I all went up to see her. Mom, went in first to see her and then came out and told Lynn and I to go in and say our good-bye's to her. The nurses and Dr.'s still were saying she was not dying, but Grandma knew she was. Lynn and I went back in the room with Mom. We walked through the doors and Grandma said to Lynn and I "your Grandma is dying, girls". Wow...I will never forget those words. We spent he next 15 minuets talking to her telling how much we loved her and would miss her. She brought up memories of Lynn and I. We laughed and we cried. I told her I was sad she would not get to meet this baby. I was 16 weeks pregnant and we had not found out what we were having at that point. I told Grandma that I thought it was a girl, so that is what we would go with. She laughed and said it probably would be! She then asked for Tim. It was a precious moment to be in her room with my Mom, Lynn and my husband saying good-bye to her. God is good. Fast forward to that night - too many details to type out. I got home from our Christmas celebration with my Mom's side of the family and my Mom called to tell me that Grandma had died. Another moment I will never forget. Grandma did know she was dying - wow. I decided to meet the family at my Grandparent's house right after we heard the news. Up to this point in my pregnancy I had felt little flutters from the baby, but nothing that made me really stop and say, wow, that was the baby. We get over to my grandparents and we sit in the living room and start sharing memories of Grandma. As we are sitting there talking, the baby goes crazy and is kicking up a storm. It was the first time I KNEW it was the baby. It was as if God was saying to me "I give and I take away".


Tim and I agreed to find out the sex of the baby at the 20 week ultrasound. We decided to find out and not tell anyone. We did not find out the sex with our first two, so this was new to us. We went to our appointment 3 weeks after Grandma died and we found out we were having our 3rd girl. We were thrilled for many reasons and so thankful she was healthy. Weeks later Tim and I were discussing names and had a couple we liked. We both really like Avery, but couldn't settle on a middle name. One night we started talking about middle names. We use middle names that are after family members. So we listed the names we could use and Tim says what about Margaret - my Grandma's first name. I had never thought to use her name in the past. It then hit me like a ton of bricks - 1.) I told her we were having a girl, and she IS a girl. 2.) I felt the baby move right after she passed away. And 3.) at the funeral, my uncle gave the eulogy and ended with these words "AND SO WE CELEBRATE THE CIRCLE OF LIFE. MOM IS EXPERIENCING TRUE PEACE WITH THE LORD AND LISA IS 4 MONTHS PREGNANT WITH ANOTHER DESCENDANT OF MARGE AND GIL." After talking about all these things, Tim and I knew what her name would be ~ Avery Margaret. My Mom was in the delivery room when she was born and it was such an honor to be able to tell her we named her Avery Margaret. Tears were flowing.

I often look at Avery and wonder what my Grandma would think about her. I envision my Grandma holding Avery in her chair, just like she did with my other two girls.

(Grandma with Halle)

Avery will not know my Grandma and that saddens me more than I would like to admit, but she will carry on her name. What a special little girl Avery is to me. I find myself looking at Avery and reminded of Grandma. It is a constant reminder that God is in control and He does have a plan and a purpose. I am often asked if we were wanting a boy for our third because we already have 2 girls. How it hurts me when I am asked that. We wanted what God wanted for this family. He knew Grandma would die when she did and He knew Avery would be born when she was. He knew she would kick when she did and He knew I would tell Grandma it was a girl. So, did we want a boy? No, we wanted our little Avery Margaret!